It's no secret that our sweet little Ila, who has always been so agreeable since birth basically, has been entering into a stage of tantrums and "toddlerness" like I've never seen. I've gotten smarter about how to stop the obnoxious behaviors like whining and badgering, but it's the "start behaviors," the things I want her to do that have been tough.
It was a proud parenting moment for me as I started the day by making this "Good Helper" chart with her over breakfast. I tried to get her to help me come up with the things on it that she knows would help mommy, especially with the new baby coming soon. She was pretty dumbfounded and said things like "smell the flowers," though still thought it was a fun activity.
This is what "we" came up with:
She even asked me to take her picture next to it!
This was the scene about 20 minutes later after I got dressed upstairs:
I will now spend the next hour reading parenting books. Any advice out there is welcome! I just want her to simply put her shoes on since I can barely reach my own feet.
I guess this is a good example of original sin - not even the promise of good can inspire good motivations or actions (like when God said to adam and eve "hey, i'll give you EVERYTHING - all this is yours - just don't eat from that one tree" and then they were like " naaah, I'd rather eff things up for the world if it means i can be in control). I know I can't make Ila want to be good or help out, so i'm resorting to some behavior management for now until she can understand bigger-picture stuff. (Like how we were made to do good and serve others, and as a result are happier people when we do). I'll let Ross have those conversations with her later on, but for now she's gonna get a kick in the crotch. Just kidding of course. That wasn't even close be being funny. Who kicks their kid in the crotch, and who even uses the word "crotch" besides me and my 9th grade biology teacher? That's another story though.
Oh Hannah Banana how I love thee! Coming from a mom who has raised an almost 6 year old spirited boy, just hang on. And, "Why did you do that" is a great book, too!
ReplyDeleteAHHHHH, yes. We are in the SAME stage. Sometimes I say to myself, "am I justified in giving her a spanking (more like a gentle swat) for not putting her socks on?" I mean, they are just socks. But really, as I am learning, it's about control, just as you said. You're doing great and you'll (we'll) be so thankful you (we) kicked her (Eden) in the junk and were consistent with discipline. At least that's what I tell myself when I'm in the fetal position after bedtime.
ReplyDeleteAddie started telling me to "stick it." I have no idea where it came from (school?) but it sounds horribly awful and amazingly hilarious at the same time. The timer on my phone is going to be worn out from so many time-outs and I can't even count how many times a day I want to say "YOU stick it" to her.
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